Jayne stopped short when he came out of the shower room wrapped only in a towel and rounded the corner into the hallway to the crew bunks, only to find some jien huo waiting for him outside his hatch.

            Hey, maybe Mal sprung for me ta have a nice piece o’ trim ta say, “Thanks Jayne for savin’ my dumb ass pi gu!”           

            Realizing he was dressed only in a towel, he suddenly wished he’d brought clothes with him to the shower room instead of just his towel since he’d been the only one up at the crew quarters anyway. 

             He always liked making a good impression with the ladies, even if he was paying for it. Meetin’ a workin’ girl in a towel just ain’t dignified, he thought.

            When he saw her tap one last time on his door before starting to crack it open, he barked, “Hey! What the gorram hell you think you’re doin’?!”

            The girl spun around and he was shocked to find River – a very grown up looking River – staring back at him.

           Her surprised smile swiftly falling into wide-eyed surprise; her eyes getting bigger the lower she looked.

            She bit her lip when her gaze reached the towel and her eyes squinted as she peered a bit to the side. He was very well structured, physically, she decided, her eyes locked onto and visually following the path of hair on his chest, tapering down into the waistband of the towel.

            River was surprised to find that she really wanted to know what was under there; she’d never had such curiosities before – let alone about Jayne – about the male form. 

            She wondered if she could get him to drop his towel.

            After a couple moments, Jayne realized two things: one, River was ogling him. And two, his John Thomas was starting to take an interest in being ogled. His hand clutched tighter at his towel.

            He thought about seeing Mal naked and septic duty and any other unappealing thoughts he could conjure up in his mind until his John Thomas’s interest waned and he sighed in relief.

            River’s eyes shot up to his and her face blushed beet red with embarrassment as he cleared his throat uncomfortably. He’d caught her staring! Why was she staring?! She’d seen him in less before! At the very least she’d seen him shirtless dozens of times!

            She turned her eyes to dart around everywhere but at him, mortified at having been caught but unable to bring herself to run away.  Standing there, she couldn’t find any words to say and cursed herself for it.

            For his part, Jayne did his best not to let show what he thought of her curves in that dress. It was a muted periwinkle silk with a pleated and low cut satin bodice and hugged her curves, emphasizing them to their full advantage. Combined with the bit of face paint she had on, he was pretty sure she could give Inara a run for her money.

           Clearing his throat again as he still felt a bit shell shocked, “Uh, what’d ya do to yourself? There a reason ya got yourself all gussied up? Or was it one a’ them girly things y’all do sometimes?”

           Taking his response as being less than favorable, she self-consciously fidgeted and played with her hair, “Simon intends to propose to Kaylee. Inara was in on the ruse and planned a makeover to secretly prepare her. Killed two birds with one stone, as well; secondary reason was to make the girl look like a woman and be noticed as such.”

           Jayne frowned, “Why you referrin’ to yourself in the – what is it? Fourth? – person again? Thought you was over callin’ yourself ‘The Girl’.”

           River looked to her left, fidgeting with her hands, her teeth worrying her lower lip. “You are clothed only in a towel. Her equilibrium has become unbalanced. She is not comfortable.”

           He rolled his eyes, “Well, if ya’d move, I could get inta my bunk an’ put somethin’ else on. Then we’d both be more comfterble.”

          She started as though that had just occurred to her and stepped aside. A slit in the skirt of her dress showed him a tempting flash of toned thigh. “You are correct. You may proceed.”

          Gorram! Girlie’s got some legs on ‘er, he thought before ripping his mind away from the thoughts he was having, lest she hear them and decide she didn’t want to be his friend any more. 

          He sent her a suspicious glare as he passed by, “You’re bein’ ruttin’ feng le, ya know that? All day ya’ve been weird.”

          His face scrunched as he thought for a moment. “Well, more ’n usual anyhow.”

          As he opened the hatch and stepped down the ladder, he left the door open, “Now don’t go peekin’ or nothin’. ‘S jus’ so’s we can still talk an’ all. Dong ma?”

          While he changed and finished cleaning himself up, River stayed up top, trying to shush the devil on her shoulder that told her to attempt to sneak a peek by telling Jayne what all she, Kaylee, and Inara had done after they’d left the jail. 

          Meanwhile, Jayne was quick; it was less than two minutes before his head poked back up as he came out of his bunk dressed in black denims and a familiar deep blue button down shirt.  

          River smiled happily, “You are wearing the shirt I got you for Christmas!”

           He looked at her for a second and then down at himself, “Huh? Oh, uh, yeah. ‘S a right fine shirt. The girls at Miss Kitty’s always love it; say it make me look all swai,” he grinned cockily at her.

            As they walked through the galley on their way to the cargo bay, he asked her in passing, “You get back here in time so’s your brother could see how pretty ya look?”

            River was still pondering over why his comment about the whores finding him swai bothered her when his question registered in her brain. She stopped in her tracks and looked up at him in surprise, a shy smile at her lips and a blush at her cheeks, “You think she looks pretty?” She couldn’t help but preen a bit and swish her skirt.

            Jayne chuckled knowingly as they headed down the stairs to the bay, “Aww hell, you know ya do. Think ‘Nara’d let you outta her sight without you lookin’ all shiny an’ prettified?”

            Her smile turned bright with still a hint of shyness as she invited, “She is – I am going to see a movie at the cortex picture house. If – if you wanted to go see a movie as well when you return, I will wait for you. My treat to celebrate your return to freedom.”  

            She hoped he would want to join her; she’d missed him while they’d been apart and wanted to spend time with her friend. It would also give her comfort to know that he was coming back.

            Even though she could sleep on her own now, she still found that she missed his warm, solid mass behind her at night and his arm wrapped around her middle. She missed cuddling into him and never feeling cold at night with him there.

            She even missed his snoring.

            He gave a shake of his head, “Nah. I’m gonna take advantage of us both bein’ able ta sleep by our lonesome an’ get me a girl for the night. Thanks though.”

           She felt something in her chest go cold – which she found most peculiar as her internal body temperature had not changed.

            “Oh,” she said quietly, her fingers fiddling with the charm around her neck, “Okay.”

            As they approached the two women still playing with the chortling baby, Zoe looked up. “You two headin’ out?”

            Jayne stopped for a second as Zoe stood up and walked with him to the ramp to open it. “I’ll be back in the mornin’ ta take watch, but yeah, I’m stayin’ out t’night. Girlie over there,” he said, motioning to River who was talking quietly to Inara. 

           He did a double-take and frowned at the melancholy look on her face. 

           He frowned. When ‘d that happen? She was fine a bit ago.

          Chalking it up to being a girl thing, he continued on, and turned back to Zoe, “said she was gonna hit a picture house but I don’t know where or when.”

         Careful to conceal her disappointment in his decision to go to a cathouse, Zoe nodded and opened the ramp. “See ya in the mornin’ then.”

---

            When the ramp finished closing, Zoe walked back over to the young pilot and the Companion gently bouncing her son to his delight. 

            After a moment or two of silence, Inara gently prompted, “What happened, mei mei?”

            Her emotions manifesting her aura had turned a riot of colors, most of them varying degrees of sadness and confusion. She’d never begrudged Jayne his need for sexual gratification, so why did she feel hurt that he was seeking it now? 

            Her hands slow and methodical as she took down her hair as she processed her thoughts; when it finally lay in a shining brown curtain down her back, she dipped her head forward, allowing it to shield her from direct view. 

            Mumbling, almost as if to herself, “She sought him out, wanted his diagnosis regarding her appearance. Said she was pretty, but she is not pretty enough.”

            Zoe just looked on as Inara took River’s hand and gently unwound the girl’s fingers from her hair. “Mei mei, look at me,” Inara ordered coaxingly.

            River’s big brown eyes, shiny with unshed tears met the concerned ones of the elder Companion. “What do you think you were not pretty enough for, mei mei? You are and look beautiful – even Jayne noticed that.”

            River looked down at her hands, her voice a whisper, “It wasn’t enough to make him stay.”

The elder women’s gazes met, acknowledging between them that River was finally realizing her feelings for the big mercenary.

            This time it was Zoe who spoke up, “Did you want him to stay, Little One?”

            River shook her head gave a restless sigh, “she doesn’t know!”

            She jumped up to pace a small line back and forth in front of her friends, taking comfort in the repetitive rhythm. 1, 2, 3, 4, turn… She was frustrated at her inability to decipher her feelings. How could she explain them to her friends if she couldn’t even make sense of her emotions?

            “Don’t think, mei mei, just talk. We’ll sort it out,” Inara urged.

---

            Eager for the night to begin, Jayne strutted through town, bypassing all the bars and lesser cathouses as he made a beeline for Miss Kitty’s, a higher class place with better girls that he’d only been able to afford occasionally over the years when times were good. Since he’d mostly quit drinking, he’d been surprised at how much extra coin he had now and almost wished he’d quit earlier.

            Coming up to the front door where it was promptly opened by a bouncer who was bigger than he, Jayne nodded to the man and went to the cashier to pay for the amount of time he wanted – you didn’t get to even see the girls until after you paid – and an alarm/locator was locked onto his wrist, allowing him to be alerted when his time was up and the bouncers to find him if there should be trouble. 

            That done, another set of bouncers opened the large French doors into the parlor where a veritable buffet of women awaited him. Fighting to keep the ecstatic grin off his face and his badass persona at the fore, he strode in and looked the room over, admiring all the tasty to be had.

            There were about twenty or so ladies (it was still fairly early in the evening) enticingly sprawled out on various pieces of furniture, showing themselves to their best advantage. His taste usually ran toward bold blondes or redheads with lush figures, who could handle a rough ride. But tonight, it seemed, none of them – including two girls he’d spent a great time with before – held much appeal and he found his eye wandering over girls whose hair was darker and their bodies petite and graceful, but he still couldn’t decide. 

            It took him a few minutes to figure out what it was he was looking for and why none of the girls held much appeal. None of them were her, he realized, shaken by the thought that he wanted River Tam. The one good friend I got an’ had ta go an’ screw it up by wantin’ her, gorram it!

           Resolute in his determination to suppress his desires, he summoned the two girls he knew from before and allowed them to lead him upstairs and away from temptation.

---

            It was late and River had long since given up that Jayne would come back to the ship tonight. It was foolhardy, she knew – as she lay on her bed, playing with her hair – and he’d told her he was planning to stay at the cathouse all night, but she’d still hoped.

            Her talk with Zoe and Inara had provided her with some clarity, and though she still wasn’t entirely certain why Jayne’s going whoring tonight distressed her so, she did have an idea. Through forming a hypothesis based on the answers given to the questions she’d asked her two friends as well as her observations of her own emotional and physical responses to her proximity to Jayne – especially those from tonight – she’d come to a conclusion of what it all meant.

            Her distress lead to one thing: she liked Jayne Cobb.

            A smile slowly grew on her face as she reveled in an inner warmth suffused her being. 

            So this is what it feels like to like a boy…

            She got up to get a drink from the galley, wanting to enjoy these new feelings for a while before she slept, fearing they might disappear with the dawn.

---

            As he walked – or rather, staggered – back to Serenity, Jayne Cobb was three things: he was embarrassed, enraged, and he was drunk. 

            After he’d left the cathouse in shame, he’d stopped at the nearest bar using his refund – from Miss Kitty herself, no less, as these things made for a bad reputation if word got out – on the strongest rotgut they had, and lots of it. 

            Unfortunately, the drunker he’d got, the meaner he’d become and before long, a brawl broke out, allowing him to work of some of his rage. Some, but not all; embers still flared in his gut.

            “That bitch put some kinda hex on me an’ ‘m gonna figure out what an’ put a end ta it,” he muttered to himself as he stormed along in a jagged line, long past able to walk straight. “Ain’t right ta mess with a man’s man-parts like that; John Thomas ain’t never had a false start ‘til her. Ruttin’ witch. Maybe I shoulda just let those ruttin’ hillfolk burn ‘er alive.”

            When he finally stumbled up the ramp and punched his code to open the airlock, he’d worked himself up into such a lather that rather than wait until morning like he’d planned, Jayne stumbled through the bay toward the guest bunks intent on giving River a piece of his mind. 

            Reaching her door, he leaned against the frame, pounding on the thin panel with his fist. “Crazy! Get your ruttin’ pi gu out here!”

            When she didn’t answer, he gripped the handle on the door and wrenched it open, disappointed when he found her room empty. He let out a growl of impotent rage and slammed it shut before turning and storming up the stairs, intent on going to his bunk when he entered the galley and saw her standing there.

---

            River looked up from where she stood making her tea at the sound of someone approaching. She knew those footsteps!

            Jayne had come back!

            She smiled up at him for half a second as he entered the galley, hoping he’d be just as happy to see her. 

            And then he noticed her and the force of his emotions hit her like a round from Vera. Grabbing her ears, she staggered back, whimpering and barely hearing his voice as he began to yell.

“What the ruttin’ hell’d you do to me you gorram witch?!”

To go back and reread if you need it:

Chapter: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8